The role of the mother of the bride has changed in recent years. Traditionally, the bride's parents paid for the wedding and the bride's mother was highly involved in the planning and organisation, but today's brides are often older and more financially secure than in the past so the role of the bride's mother has become a more supportive one.

So how can the mother of the bride support her daughter?

The first way is to listen. It might sound obvious, but when planning a wedding THE BRIDE WILL GET STRESSED! By lending a sympathetic ear to any rants and frustrations, you will be helping in the best way possible.

The second way the bride's mother can help is by giving advice. Your daughter may ask you to accompany her to view venues, dresses, florists etc and will welcome your opinions. It may sound obvious that constructive criticism is useful, but try and keep your views on the bride's choice of ceremony, theme, dress etc positive and encouraging.

Thirdly, as the wedding day approaches you will need to find your mother of the bride outfit. You can help your daughter by choosing something that ties in with her theme or colour scheme - no-one wants wedding photos where the bride's mother clashes with the bridesmaids! It is a good idea to take your daughter with you to look at outfits so she gives you advice too - after all, a second opinion is always good. Traditionally, the mother of the bride is the last to take her seat at the wedding ceremony and will sit on the same table as the bride and groom, so you need an outfit that will look fantastic. Many mothers are worried about upstaging the bride, but that very rarely happens in reality! It is a good idea to coordinate with other women sitting on the top table to make sure that your outfits aren't too similar.

On the wedding day, for a formal wedding, the bride's mother usually travels in the car with the bridesmaids, and her main role is to step back a little and let her daughter shine. Along with the bridesmaids, she should ensure that her daughter's day is as stress free and enjoyable as possible. This might involve liaising with staff at the venue, looking after children, or anything else your daughter needs help with.

Lastly, the mother of the bride should stay calm. Whatever events occur, either in planning or on the day, your calmness will help your daughter more than anything else.

Whatever level of involvement you have with your daughter's wedding, remember it is a day for her to remember for the rest of her life. If you do that, then every decision you make, piece of advice you give, or thing you do to help will be the right one.